The Alucard Trilogy
Part I: Dhampir
Kevin, Stacey, and Simon Belmont were on Castlevania, fighting the forces of Dracula. Despite the fact that they outnumbered the humans a hundred to one, the monsters were being decimated, mostly due to Stacey's silver boomerang and Simon's vampire-hunting skills.
"Damn the N Team!" cursed the Count. "They are cutting our forces down like so much chaff!"
"Hellfire!" added Alucard. "I can't believe three mortals are beating -- uhrk!" Stacey's boomerang caught in his throat, spraying him with blood.
"Did I...kill him?" asked Stacey worriedly.
"It's nice to know you have qualms against killing," said Kevin.
"It's not that," argued Stacey. "it's just that he was kind of cute."
Alucard gripped the boomerang and tore it from his throat. "Now, wench," he snarled, "we'll see how you like having your precious bauble stuck in your throat!"
He threw it savagely, where it hit the ground in front of Stacey.
"You don't know anything about throwing bomerangs, do you?" she smiled.
"We are running out of time!" shouted Dracula. "Look, Alucard -- the sun is rising!"
"We must return to the castle!" shouted Alucard. Then he turned toward the N-Team heroes and threatened, "The sun won't be up forever, N-Team. This is not over."
"You bet it's not!" shouted Stacey as the vampire nobles turned into bats.
She hurled her boomerang again, throwing in an upward motion. One of the bats had its wings sheared off!
"Damnation, not again!" groaned the bat, whom Stacey deduced was Alucard, as it plunged to Earth.
The bat hit the ground, transforming back into Alucard. As the vampire prince regenerated its arms, Simon wrapped his magic whip around the fiend.
"Now it's over," said Stacey. "Three minutes before the sunlight smokes you, Al. But first -- this is for calling me a wench!" And she kicked him in the balls.
Five minutes later, Simon looked at his watch. "Funny...you should have disintegrated some time ago."
Five minutes after that, a very perplexed N Team stared at an even more perplexed Alucard.
"Nothing's...happening," said Alucard in shock.
"Maybe the magic whip is -- no, that's impossible," thought Simon.
"Maybe my boomerang...no, that's not it," pondered Stacey.
"The blood loss?...no that doesn't make sense either," said Kevin.
"I'm as confused as you are!" said Alucard, shrugging -- and as he did so, the magic whip dropped from him.
"And now the whip's magic isn't working!" said Simon.
"You don't suppose something's affected the magical field of Castlevania, do you?" questioned Stacey, worried.
The whip returned to Simon's hand.
"No, the whip's magic is still working after all," said the vampire hunter.
"As much as I'd like to discuss this phenomenon," said Alucard, "I've a castle to return to." He spread his cape in the batwings position, jumped -- and fell down. "Ouch!" he yelled, banging his head on a rock.
"This is getting weirder and weirder," said Kevin.
"Geez," said Stacey. "You've got a pretty ugly wound."
Alucard stared at himself in Simon's mirror. "Yes, I can tell from my reflection that -- my reflection?!?" he gasped in shock. "This can't be! I'm a vampire! I don't have a reflection!"
"Let's get you to a doctor," said Kevin. "Then we'll hold you in a detention cell in the Palace of Power until we figure out what's happened."
"Say!" grinned Simon as they entered the streets of Warakiya. "There's a place that'll take care of you!" He pointed in the direction of a cathedral.
"What!" exclaimed Alucard. "You want me to enter a -- a church!? But it's sacred ground! It'll kill even me stone dead!"
"Somehow, Al," said Kevin thoughtfully, "I doubt it. You're obviously not a vampire anymore."
The priest was amazed as Alucard entered the church. "Alucard! Son of the evil Dracula! But...what are you doing in the daylight?!"
"That's one of the things I want to know," said Alucard.
The team explained what happened.
"Hmm," said the priest. He held a crucifix out toward Alucard. The young once-vampire flinched, then realized the crucifix wasn't damaging him.
The priest then dipped his hand in a basin of holy water. Chanting in a Latin-sounding tongue, he touched Alucard's forehead. The hand glowed, as did the injured section. To Alucard's surprise, it felt warm, yet gave him no pain.
"Strange," he thought, "religious items harmed me before."
"Hmm," said the priest again. "Alucard...was your mother a vampire?"
"No," said Alucard. "As my father once said, 'She was not blessed with that gift.'"
"You call being a blood-sucking fiend a gift?" said Simon hotly.
"Be careful, Belmont," warned Alucard. "I'm no longer a vampire, and your weapons can't hurt me anymore!"
"You want to bet?" threatened Simon.
"Yes, I want to bet!" challenged Alucard.
"Gentlemen, please!" pleaded the priest, pushing the two antagonists away. "This is a house of peace, not anger!"
"Yeah, Simon, chill," said Kevin, pulling the vampire hunter away from Alucard.
"But he started it," whined Simon childishly.
"If we may continue where we started," said the priest. Turning to Alucard, he asked. "So, your mother wasn't a vampire?"
"No," said Alucard truthfully.
"I have something to look up," said the priest. "In the meantime, if there is any quarrel left in you, keep it down to insults."
"I can't believe I'm in a church," said Alucard. "When I was a vampire, it would have blown me to shreds just to step on the stairs of one."
"Just out of curiosity...do you believe in God?" asked Stacey.
"Well...not the way you mortals do," shrugged Alucard. "To Castlevania's monsters, He is an enemy, a destroyer."
"You know," said Kevin. "sometimes I wonder why people in the 20th century still believe in a God, or gods. Maybe it's just a psychological thing that keeps people going."
"Perhaps," said Simon, shrugging. "No matter what religion you follow, it tells you to always do the right thing and to hang in there when times are tough. That's what it's about, right? About having faith."
"As in, faith that good wil triumph over evil?" asked Alucard.
The priest returned holding a book. "Here it is," he said. "According to this, you're a dhampir."
"A what?" Alucard was confused.
"A creature half-human, half-vampire," explained the priest. "Here," he commanded, handing the book to Alucard.
Alucard read the book. "'At night, the dhampir hath the powers of his vampyre sire. But when the sun's warmth and light doth touch his flesh, he turneth to his mortal corpus.'"
"What the he...ck does that mean?" asked Kevin, remembering that he was in a church and not wanting to seem disrespectful, especially in front of a priest.
"It means that I'm a vampire at night and a human by day," explained Alucard. "That's interesting...but why didn't my father tell me?" Then he read the rest of the entry. "'The dhampir, knowing his vampyre sire to be an affront to God and a peril to man, must abide by his human soul and smite his sire down.'"
"Meaning?" asked Stacey.
Alucard paused. "It means I must kill my own father," he said nervously. "I'm...not sure I want to do that."
"Look," said Kevin, "it's obvious he's lied to you, making you think you were a true vampire. He's just like that."
Alucard paused. "It's true," he finally realized. "I once called myself Alucard because it was an amusing perversion of Dracula, which tested my father's pleasure with me. But now this damnable truth is out, and I shall make him pay!" His voice rang with anger and hatred. "Now, just as my childish self-given nickname is 'Dracula' in reverse, so I shall be the opposite of all he is!"
"Your name isn't really Alucard?" asked Simon. "Then what is it?"
"'Dracula' is simply a title granted my father," explained Alucard, "a word meaning 'devil'. His true name is Vlad Tepes, and the name with which I was christened...is Adrian F. Tepes."
"Welcome to the good guy's side, Adrian!" grinned Kevin.
Part II: The History of Dracula
Kevin, Stacey, and Simon warped back to the Palace of Power with Alucard.
"Kevin?" asked Lana. "What's Alucard doing here?"
"It's a long story," said Kevin.
"So, Alucard, is this true that you're a...a 'damper'?"
"Dhampir," corrected Alucard. "And yes, it is the truth."
"Hmmm," said Lana thoughtfully. "This could be useful. I want you to tell me all you know about your father."
"I shall, Your Highness," said Alucard obediently. "My father was once Vlad Tepes, a mighty soldier and nobleman of Castlevania. So ferocious was he in battle that he was called 'Vlad Dracula', meaning 'the Son of the Dragon', by enemies and allies alike. But his bloodthirstiness extended beyond the battlefield. His favorite pastime was to impale the bodies of his enemies on sharp wooden pikes, earning him a new nickname, 'Vlad the Impaler'."
Lana paled and grew disconcerted by this.
"Not that he did not have a sense of humor, of course," said Alucard. "A couple of Persians from Persia visited him, and when they refused to remove their turbans, saying it was against their custom, he helped them keep their custom by -- here's the humorous part -- nailing the turbans to their heads!"
Lana sickened, her disgust becoming visible.
"And when one visiting noble complained of the stench of impaled corpses," said Alucard between giggles, "my father impaled him on a higher pike than the rest!" He broke out into laughter.
Lana hopped off the throne, headed for the Palace bathroom, and puked in the toilet.
"That was awful!" she complained. "That was the most horrible thing I ever heard!"
"Do you want to know how he became a vampire?" asked Alucard through the bathroom door.
"You might as well," said Lana unhappily.
"I do not know precisely how it happened," said Alucard. "It was before my birth, and my father never speaks of it. I do theorize, however, that it has to do with the Grim Reaper of Castlevania."
"As opposed to the Grim Reapers of Newsland, Olympus, and other worlds with Grim Reapers?" asked Simon. "Might explain why the Reaper works for Drac, anyway."
"After he came back and fathered me, my mother, who was mortal at the time, discovered his vampiric secret. Unable to live with a bloodthirsty living corpse or a half-undead baby, she...committed suicide." Alucard lowered his head in sorrow, then continued. "Because suicide is against Castlevanian religion, she was reborn as the woman called Vampira."
"Geez," said Kevin, "that's a really lousy family problem you've got there."
"Yeah," said Stacey, "talk about dysfunctional families."
"So...Kevin and the others have voted me in as an N Team member," said Alucard. "Do you want to make it my official status?"
"As soon as I leave this bathroom," said Lana before she puked again.
Part III: The New Blood
"YAAAAAAAHH!" the banshee-like wail reverberated throughout the Palace of Power.
"Simon?" asked Kevin, concerned. "What is it?"
"Is it another mega problem from Mother Brain?" asked Mega Man.
"Are we under attack?" asked Lana.
"Is that ape-icus maximus Donkey Kong trying to climb the Palace?" asked Kid Icarus.
"Worse!" whined Simon. "I'm getting wrinkles!!"
The looks of concern turned into looks of "Why me, God?"
"What is the matter?" asked Alucard.
"Simon's pulled a false alarm on account of he's getting old," said Kevin.
"You see?" asked Simon. "I'm getting them here, and here, and here!"
"Hmmm," said Alucard. "Between you and me, Simon, it's even worse than simply losing your looks."
"What?!" exclaimed Simon as if the young dhampir had uttered the most blasphemous curse imaginable. "It can't possibly be worse than that! It can't!"
"But it is," said Alucard. "It's a reminder that you're mortal, and that you're going to die someday. Hmmm...have you ever thought about starting a family?"
"I always thought of the N Team as my family," said Simon thoughtfully. "Besides, I'm not sure I can raise kids. Sometimes I'm not even sure I've grown up myself."
"Hmm," said Alucard again. "Perhaps it is time you took an apprentice. I plan to embrace my dhampiric destiny."
"You mean...you want to become a vampire hunter?" asked Simon surprisedly.
"That's great!" cheered Simon enthusiastically. "I know just the place to start! We'll go to Castlevania!"
As they materialized on Castlevania, they met two other people, one with a sword, the other armed with a spear.
"Who are you guys?" asked Simon.
"Howdy," said the cowboy-looking one, "I'm John Morris, and this here's Eric Lecarde, my compadre." He pointed at his spear-holding friend, who nodded grimly. "We wanna know how to take on Dracula," said John. "You two hombres coming with us?"
"I was just going to teach Alucard here about vampire-hunting myself," grinned Simon.
"Whee-doggies! Let's go!" shouted John exuberantly.
"Whoa!" said Simon, restraining the cowboy. "Your first vampire-hunting lessson is, 'Never rush into anything unless you know what you're doing.'"
"Hey, I'm a fast learner!" bragged John.
As the two learned tips on wilderness survival, specific monster weaknesses, and related subjects, Alucard noticed that Eric Lecarde had not said a word.
"Eric doesn't seem to talk very much," said Alucard.
"He ain't been the same since Dracula killed his girlfriend," shrugged John.
"Is that the truth?" exclaimed a shocked Alucard.
Eric muttered something about "muerte" and burst into tears.
"He's kinda touchy about it," warned John.
"I...I see," said Alucard, upset.
As night fell, Alucard began to feel strange. "The sun's going down...I...feel strange." Suddenly he felt stronger. "My vampire powers -- they've returned! It must be the sun that transforms me from human to vampire and back!"
"Vampire?" exclaimed John, suddenly enraged. "You ornery polecat! I knew your clothing was familiar! Yer Dracula's kid!"
"DIEEE!" screamed Eric, lunging with his spear.
"Settle down, you two!" barked Simon, and the vampire hunters froze in their tracks.
"In case you've forgotten," said Alucard, "until a few seconds ago, I was a human, just as you are. But I'm not really vampire or human -- I'm a dhampir."
"You're a whut?" wondered John, still suspicious. "A...a 'diaper'?"
"Dom-peer," said Alucard, pronouncing it. "My father was a vampire, but my mother was human."
"Still, knowing yer Drac's kid...how do I know we can trust you?" asked John, doubtful.
"Well, Jonathan," smiled Alucard, "if I did mean you harm, you wouldn't be alive to ask that question."
"In a real twisted way," pondered John, "you got a point."
They continued on their trek towards Dracula's castle, slaying monsters (with Simon's pointers).
As they reached the castle, Simon muttered, "Funny, we should've been attacked by now. But the castle gates are almost unguarded...just those two zombies."
"Yes," said Alucard as he absentmindedly summoned his Balls of Destruction, destroying the two animated corpses. "I wonder what..." Then he perked up his nose. "Do you smell that?"
"Smell what?" asked Simon.
"They're making blood sausages...and bloodmeat pies," said Alucard. "Something I used to like, until I rediscovered my humanity."
They crept down to a window and looked in. The kitchen of the castle looked like a slaughterhouse. Human body parts were being chopped into a red, bloody pulp. The ground human flesh was being used to fill a large pie crust. Eric and John ran for the nearest tree, gagging with revulsion. Even Simon turned green at the sight.
Alucard's face was lined with wistfulness. "And to think...I once enjoyed bloodmeat pie, even knowing the ingredients."
"Dracula did that to you," said Simon. "He didn't want to lose his family, but he didn't want you knowing about your humanity, either." Then he saw something that made his heart stop. "Alucard, look!"
"The N Team!" exclaimed Alucard, noticing the heroes chained to the wall.
"We gotta help them!" exclaimed John Morris when he and Eric returned from where they'd been retching.
"A vampire hunter never proceeds without a plan of attack," informed Simon.
"I think I have one," said Alucard.
"So, have you got the recipe straightened out?" the mummy chef asked his werewolf assistant.
"Yes," said the werewolf. "After we bake the pie, we pour the blood into it."
"Only the first few gallons or so," said the mummy. "We need the rest to make the frosting."
"Got it," said the werewolf.
Suddenly, Alucard crashed through the kitchen door. Simon, John, and Eric were tied up with Simon's whip.
"Is it all right?" asked Alucard.
"Master Alucard!" exclaimed the mummy and the werewolf. They bowed before the son of Count Dracula.
"Father informed me of the bloodmeat pie you were making," said Alucard. He offered the captured vampire hunters. "So I was wondering if you could use some ingredients."
"I shoulda known you couldn't be trusted, you sidewinder!" exploded John angrily.
"A most gracious gift, sire," said the mummy, "but we've more than enough ingredients." He motioned to the N Team, who were crestfallen at Alucard's seeming betrayal.
"Not for long!" smiled Alucard cruelly.
"Now!" shouted Simon as he willed his magic whip to unwind.
The quartet of vampire hunters sprang into action.
As Simon, John, and Eric cut down the monsters, Alucard snapped the N Team's bonds. "Are you all right?" he asked.
"They...they were going to..." Lana struggled to explain in her horror.
"Yes, I know," said Alucard grimly. "How did they capture you?"
"We were 'invited' to Count Dracula and Countess Bartley's wedding," said Kevin, emphasizing the word "invited" with considerable sarcasm.
"Bartley?" asked John. "That there's the vampire woman what's wanted for several murders! We's after her, too!"
"What about the other people?" asked Mega Man.
"They're pie filling," said Simon gruesomely.
"Let's just get you out of this hell," said Alucard in reference to the gruesome kitchen.
They reached the main hallway of the castle.
Suddenly, Count Dracula and Countess Bartley materialized before them.
"Alucard," said Dracula in a mock fatherly voice. "Why do you fraternize with these, your enemies?"
"Because you are my enemy now!" exclaimed Alucard angrily. "You deceived me about my true nature! You led me to believe myself a full vampire, when I had some humanity within me!"
"Come, come," said Dracula in a falsely benevolent voice. "If you wish to be purely vampiric, we'll arrange it for you."
"No!" shouted Alucard, refusing to let himself be fooled again. "These are my friends now, and I will not betray them!"
"End this foolishness now, Alucard," ordered Dracula. "Embrace your destiny."
"I have already embraced it!" said Alucard hotly as he drew his sword. "And my destiny is to destroy you!"
"Let's take him!" shouted John as he and Eric readied their weapons. "He can't handle all of us!"
Dracula chuckled evilly, spreading his arms. A powerful gust of wind blew them all out the front door, away from the castle, and into the forest.
As the heroes collapsed in a heap, Simon muttered, "Vampire Hunting Lesson number thirty-nine: 'Never underestimate your opponent.'"
Later that night, the four vampire hunters gathered in the palace of the Poltergeist King.
"Poltergeist King?" asked Simon. "I need to speak with you."
"Ah, Simon Belmont!" smiled the ancient spirit of justice. "And who are these fine young men?"
"You probably know Alucard," said Simon. "He's one of the good guys now."
"I am glad to have you with us, Alucard," smiled the Poltergeist King.
"The pleasure is mine, Your Majesty," said Alucard, bowing.
"This is John Morris," introduced Simon.
"I believe I knew your father, young man," said the Poltergeist King. "I'm sure he is happy to have such a fine young man follow in his footsteps."
"Pleased to hear that, Yer Highness," smiled John.
"And Eric Lecarde," said Simon.
"I know about your beloved, Eric," said the Poltergeist King, bowing sadly. "Rest assured, she knows that you did your best to save her, and that she still loves you."
"Wasn't good enough," muttered Eric.
"The past cannot be changed," said the King wistfully. "But the future can. Working together, perhaps the four of you may one day destroy Dracula."
The four heroes joined hands. "To free Castlevania!" they cheered.